Monday, March 4, 2024

an election






you are a citizen of the republic of g. every four years there is an election for prime minister and every citizen is required to vote, and to actually cast a vote for one of the candidates who have made it to the final round. any citizen not voting, or submitting a blank ballot, or attempting to write in a candidate, is subject to 25 years in prison and the confiscation of all their property. in short, you must vote for one of the candidates.

the seven candidates in the upcoming election are genghis khan, herbert asquith, rosie the riveter, mother hubbard, colossus v, robin hood, and nancy pelosi.

their platforms are as follows:

genghis khan:

world government,
a single fixed income for all citizens,
climate change the number one priority of government,
the abolition of war,
and the outlawing of abortion and gender reassignment surgery.

herbert asquith:

permanent war,
gladiatorial games,
the return of slavery,
the abolition of religion,
abolition of nuclear family,
legalization of drugs.
legalization of abortion,
climate change a priority
all positions in society, including slavery, determined by tests.

rosie the riveter:

reduction by abortion of the male population to 1% of the total population (pending the advent of cloning, when men can be disposed of completely),
single fixed income for all citizens,
permanent war,
no measures to combat climate change.

mother hubbard:

world peace,
no abortion or gender reassignment
all citizens required to pray two hours a day,
single fixed income for all citizens,
major effort to fight climate change,
no gay or transgender rights.

colossus v:

all citizens are slaves,
and work every day on a fleet of ships which will conquer the galaxy.
all reproduction at the direction of the state,
no activity except work, sleeping, eating, and state directed reproduction,
all citizens are equal and receive exactly equal amounts of food, clothing, living space. etc

robin hood:

no rules or government at all
no authority and therefore no appeals to authority

nancy pelosi:

reduction of the human population to 26 people, the number to be strictly maintained after it is achieved.
return of the human population to its original home in the olduvai gorge in africa.
cloning of all extinct animals , including dinosaurs and dragons, and the return to them of their original homelands




No comments:

Post a Comment